The day before college graduation

Is it actually tomorrow? It feels like just yesterday I was moving into my freshman dorm. I remember everything about that day. Driving up to campus with two cars, one just me and Mike, blasting the summer radio. Meeting my roommate (that didn't go well in the long run, but who could've known then?). Saying goodbye - not that everyone was that far away, but an hour was still an hour. And I didn't have a car. And it was a very, very hot August, and there was no air conditioning in the dorm.

I loved college, but there were so many times I wanted to be finished. When I had to sit through math and science liberal arts classes and was literally counting down the minutes until they were over. When the work piled up so much that it was really difficult to comprehend that the semester would really, really (really) end. When it was pouring outside (or, more likely, a freezing wind tunnel) and the last thing I wanted to do was make the trek across campus. When I was sick much more than I used to be. When I couldn't see Mike for long periods of time, up to a month. When, during student teaching, I basically had to put my head down and work the hardest I ever have in my life for two months. When the job search seemed like the most daunting task ever (this is mostly right now).

Like I said, though, there were so many things I loved about college - that overpower the negatives. I loved performing with musical theatre freshman and sophomore years, before I decided to concentrate more on my work and my closest friends. I loved working for Phonathon and getting to talk to alumni (when they were nice - some of the most pleasant conversations I've ever had with other human beings occurred on those telephone lines). I loved working at the tutoring center and seeing the "lightbulb" go on for my history and writing students (which assured me I had picked the right career path). I loved quilting in my free time and when I got home - it was during college that I taught myself to sew and loved it from the beginning. I loved doing research and writing papers that really interested me (Holocaust, Berlin Wall). I loved the internship in NYC that I was able to do. I LOVED going abroad and seeing the places I had been studying for years - nothing beat that, except for all the things I did with my friends.

I loved going on the many trips, especially with Melissa, because we were so often doing that together :) I loved getting food out and just being lazy on the weekends (well, besides homework). I loved taking a risk and living with someone who turned out to be one of my best friends (Kristina) - living with someone who you really love is hard to beat (and when you don't really get on each others' nerves, even better). I loved playing bingo on Friday nights when other people were at parties (really!). I loved all the snowed-in days. I loved watching the final season of Lost with my friends every week. I loved hanging out in the library, in the student center waiting for finals week massages, outside at the tables, etc. I loved taking walks around our beautiful campus. I loved being able to meet several friends in one day over meals, or just for a chat. I loved eating with my friends at lunch and dinner - we would all find times to eat in the dining hall together. I loved going for coffee after morning classes, or after brunch on the weekends with my friends. I loved the period of time where I was right next to the gym and went there all the time - and controlled my eating habits, too! I loved the satisfaction of handing in HUGE assignments (90 page senior thesis, finishing student teaching). On that note, I loved my student teaching experience and wouldn't change a thing if given the chance. I've been so lucky. It was moments like these I felt like I conquered the world. And in a way, it really was the little things.

It's hard to think about the next stage. Yes, I'm getting married and *hopefully* moving out soon, with the love of my life - and I absolutely cannot wait. Once I get a job, I will feel much better. However... I have been waiting for graduation day for so long... and it's finally almost here!!!!!

-Jess (yes, the little turtle at the bottom of my page is actually at the finish line!)

Reflections on the last week

It's been a crazy week! Friday was my last day of student teaching. I stayed the weekend with my friends. Tuesday night was my last final, and today I had a big job interview. I just feel like I need to write some things down, so here goes.

Friday was a really overwhelming day. I was really relieved/excited because student teaching, which was the most work I've ever done in my life in a consolidated amount of time, was over. However, I absolutely love the students and teachers that I have been working with, and I didn't want to leave.

 They sent me off in a grand fashion. It felt like there was a surprise every hour. When I came in, my cooperating teacher and I exchanged gifts, and he gave me a very sweet card. He also gave me a bunch of cards the kids had made throughout the week. I actually didn't cry the whole day (don't ask me how that happened) but I did get a little teary eyed a few times - like when I read the cards.

At the beginning of first period, my co-op announced that the students should pass around the teacher textbook. They are retiring the old textbooks because the new series came in (they look amazing and I wish I could work with them!) - so he was using my book as a yearbook. The students wrote letters to me on whatever page in this 800 page book that they wished. THAT was a moment I almost cried, to be honest. I got to read some of the letters and they were so sweet. Some of the students left me clues on the first page in order to find their message... hahaha. It was one of the best gifts I've ever received. My in class support teacher also gave me this beautiful purple jewelry set.

Then, my co-op surprised me with a huge sheet cake during lunch. Most of the faculty came in to celebrate and brought food. Then, at the end of the day, I got a beautiful card from the faculty. In addition, the students filled out little evaluations for me (I liked... [one thing], I think you should improve... [one thing]). They gave me very constructive criticism but some of the things they wrote were very, very sweet (again - I can't think of another word to say.) I may have to share some of their comments another time.

Leaving was hard. My co-op gave me a handshake ("on a professional note") and a hug ("on a personal note"). Luckily I had somewhere fun to be - dinner with my friends down by the college. :)

We had dinner and Kristina and I shared all of our experiences from the day - she also left her student teaching placement. Then, we went to the carnival on campus, and that was a fantastic way to stop being sad and finally spend some time with my friends this semester. :)

The next day was very relaxing, spent with my friends. I had to do some work for my presentation, but that wasn't my main goal for the day. It was a lazy Saturday. That night we went to a fun. concert in Philly, and it was so awesome - the third time I've seen the band and the best. Everyone was so excited to be there and the band was so HAPPY (you could just tell by their faces). They just hit it big with their song, "We are Young," so they're understandably excited. It was a blast.

The next day I drove home and spent some time with my sister and with cleaning my room. Tuesday night was my final presentation on student teaching and now that it's over, I just don't care. :)

More soon!
-Jess

2011 into 2012

Things that were awesome this year:
-Internship in NYC and living there for eight days for free.
-GOING TO EUROPE. Finally. And falling completely in love with it.
-Almost finishing my senior thesis.
-Getting a great, regular, new babysitting job with great kids/parents that pays well.
-Starting my Etsy shop.
-Getting my first commission t-shirt quilts to make.
-Getting my student teaching placement.
-Choosing a date and place for our wedding.
-Starting to substitute teach for the first time.
-Living with one of my best friends again.


Things I'm looking forward to in 2012 (it's a big year):
-Student teaching in middle school.
-Coldplay, Blue October, and Fun. concerts (some of my favorite bands!)
-Graduating from college.
-Seeing my grandma and mom get better.
-Making a quilt with my mom, start to finish.
-Our wedding!
-Actually living in the same house as Mike.
-Looking for a teaching job and hopefully getting one.
-The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey and The Hunger Games (movies).
-Continuing to quilt/finishing my longest WIP (work in progress) - my wedding quilt.

Woo! Bring it on, 2012!

Last full day living at school

I can't believe it's my last day! I have a (very difficult) final tomorrow morning from 11-2 (I WILL be there the whole time), then I'm eating something quick and signing out. All my stuff will be ready to move. I just can't believe it's over! I'm a little sad, but I'm extremely happy to be going to home to enjoy the holiday season (it's really hard to do that here - they decided to put up the big Christmas tree and menorah about a week ago). Also, not so much anymore, but everyone has been super stressed about finals here. Not exactly the cheery holiday atmosphere.

Because I'm weird, one of the things I'm looking forward to most (besides seeing my family and Mike everyday, and quilting again all the time) is getting all my stuff in one place.

Case in point: Last night, my friends were taking me out for my birthday dinner at Cheeburger Cheeburger. I had brought all my pants home earlier in the week (though I thought I left one pair of jeans at school) - because I needed to get some stuff out of here. Of course there were no jeans! I went to dinner in sweatpants. Not really complaining, and it wasn't a big deal (it's not at all a fancy place), but having your things in two different places can be a issue sometimes.

I just got my last meal equiv coffee, and now I'm studying and packing. This is so weird.

Sitting in Barnes and Noble

I think this is going to become a normal thing for me. Something about sitting here with my coffee really makes me get work done (okay, not right this second, but you see my point). I've only been here for about 20 minutes and I got more work done on my paper than I would in an hour in my dorm.

It's very relaxing - I'm sipping a delicious pumpkin spice latte, and I'm listening to the Vitamin String Quartet's Christmas Album, but I can still hear people talking in the background. Specifically, the people ordering coffee and a lady next to me, who is tutoring a 3rd grade boy. I can't help but think about my future as a teacher while I sit here. I want to be that person who tutors kids, who helps them understand. I'm enthusiastic and I really care about them. It just makes me want to finish college right now and start living. I know I talk about college in a different way than other students might, but hey, that's just how I feel. I feel like these last couple months are holding me back from my full potential. I know being in the "real world" is going to be difficult. I know it's going to cost a lot of money that I don't necessarily have - especially when I have to start paying back my student loans.

But I am so ready.

Also, being here makes me excited for Christmas. The mall, from what I can see, has a few decorations up already - is that holly? Maybe. Haha. Maybe not. I can't wait for the holidays. I can't wait to be home with my family.

Bring it on, November... now, to finish this historiography paper.

-Jess

Real Life!

It is literally 1 month and 3 weeks until I will be back to real life. College will be over (excluding student teaching). I will no longer live in a drafty dorm. I no longer will be out of the loop with everything going on in the outside world (as much as I try to keep up). I will never have to write a paper again for a class I couldn't care less about. I will never have to do statistics problems every week to hand in. I'll never (hopefully) be woken up again by drunk people stomping up the stairs at 3 am. I'll have all my stuff in ONE PLACE (and downsized). I'll be able to eat normal food; ie, not microwaveable oatmeal and cutting vegetables over the sink on a tiny bathroom counter. I will never again (hopefully) be woken up by a fire alarm at 2 am the night before an 8am final (freshman year... good times). Being able to sew whenever I have free time. NOt having to walk a quarter of a mile or so to get to my car.

There are things that I will miss, though. One of my best friends being ten feet away in the room next to me. Going to weekend breakfast at 12:30 pm with my friends. Going to dinner with friends almost every night. Not having to pay tons of bills. Getting ice cream or fast food or greasy food in general at midnight. Getting coffee at the library cafe and relaxing there. Walking and riding my bike around campus. Being a student (as much as I want a break from school right now, I will eventually miss this - at least, being in classes that interest me). Doing research on the Holocaust for my thesis. Working at the tutoring center and at Phonathon. Going on school-sponsored "free" trips. Using my ID to pay for things.

It's just a new chapter in my life. I was inspired by Julie to make the following visual representation of my life after college. They are all things I would like to do - but in terms of going back for my master's degree one day - possibilities.

This is really helping me write a career goal essay for a scholarship.

Thanks for reading.

-Jess

Be nice to the telemarketers

- especially the ones from your alma mater :) Just saying. We're not REALLY telemarketers - we're your COLLEGE! Well, see, after working in this position for a long time (this is my 5th full semester) - you develop opinions about these things.

I really love my job. It's given me more confidence than I EVER thought I could have on the phone; I used to get nervous calling anyone, really. Now it's a walk in the park. No problem. I love working - I have friends there, we play games, we have fun, I make good money, I play sudoku, there's food in a closet just for us (the college likes to keep us happy :) ). I get told by very nice alumni that I'm good at what I do, and I love hearing some of their stories from the days they were here (like when Route 31 was Route 69 and they actually had to change it because of the two colleges nearby/sign theft... use your imagination), and about how certain academic buildings used to be dorms, and how girls/boys were separated. I really love talking to people - even the ones who aren't as interested in sharing or learning about the updates.

However, all of us have had bad nights. Nights where people will yell at us, hang up, belittle us, etc. Some examples come to mind, but one happened tonight. First, I should explain: We call Sunday night- Thursday night, 6:30 until 9pm, and on Sunday afternoons from 2-4:45pm. I called an alum tonight at 8:40 pm, almost the end of the shift:

Me: Hi, my name is Jessica, and I'm a student calling from ___(my college)____. May I please speak with ___(person's name)___?

Lady: *big sigh* Let me just start by saying, how do you have the NERVE to call ANYONE after 8PM?!?

Me: Oh, I'm sorry, we usually call between 6:30 and 9 so -

And she just hung up. Like, come on. I understand I may have caught you at a bad time, or that you've been getting calls from us (to which I say, just pick up the phone and we'll stop calling you!), or maybe you were busy, or you have kids that were going to sleep. I'm sorry about that. I really am. Several callers have been yelled at over the years for calling "too late." That's fine. But do you really have to act like that? If she'd have let me finish, I would have told her we could call her during the day instead, and hopefully end on a good note. But no.

So, I ask you, please be nice to your college/the telemarketers. I'm calling you because it's my job, and the least you can do is be polite back to me.

Almost October?!

Is that real? Is this real life? Is September really over?

Yep.

It's comforting to me this year. I really do love college. I do! I do. But, this winter, I'll be home with my family and Mike, and I won't be leaving again. That really makes me happier than anything.

But for now, I'm really enjoying senior year. A lot more than I thought I would. Yes, there's a ton of work, and yes, my thesis is starting to take over my life, but I can't help but be happy living with the best floormate ever and seeing my friends all the time (the ones at college, at least!)!

Plus, the library cafe has pumpkin lattes.

I'm also SUPER excited about all the sewing I have coming up. I've been COMMISSIONED to make THREE t-shirt quilts, and I'm going to make more stuff for my etsy shop. I'm so excited. Plus, I have two really special projects that I'm going to start over winter break.

Plus, I love buying presents for people for the holidays, and I'm making some things too.

And in one month... I'll start playing Christmas music =D November 1st!

I hope to post again soon. I'm super busy but I'll be back!

Favorite sound right now: Coldplay, "Now My Feet Won't Touch the Ground"

Sight: "How I Met Your Mother" Season Two (and homework, right? Right.)

Taste: Chocolate chip cookies and milk =D

Smell: Nothing (that's good)

-Jess

Weekends at College

This is my first weekend back, and it's quite relaxing. I always like the freedom of getting up a little bit later, eating brunch with my friends (the dining hall has breakfast food until 2 pm), getting coffee, and spending the day in the library (sometimes doing work, other times talking/Facebook/hand-sewing/laughing/staring out the window). Then, I'll have a relaxing dinner with friends, maybe watch a movie, or just hang out. The cycle is usually the same on Sundays, but even more relaxing. Some weekends, Mike will come for the night and I'll get to spend time with him. Sometimes my friends and I will get takeout. Sometimes we'll go get Halo Farms ice cream and go out to On the Border (like this weekend), or we'll go on one of the school's free bus trips to Washington, D.C. or Philly or NYC or New Hope.

It's always a nice break from the crazy week, even if there is a lot of work to be done. This morning, for the third day in a row, I actually made it on the Loop (2 miles around campus), and I feel great! Now I'm sitting in the library cafe with Melissa, my Holocaust books, and my iced caramel macchiato, and life is good.

Senior Year Thoughts

It's funny how being a senior in college is different, for most people, than it is in high school. As you approach high school graduation, all you want to do is go to college, if that's where you are heading. There are new people to meet, dorm room things to buy, and a whole new world to explore. Even if you're not going to college, you probably wanted to get the heck out of high school. Graduating from college is the opposite - people don't want to leave. The real world awaits, and with that comes scary things like rent and putting on our grown up pants.

I'm on the fence. Part of me wants to stay, but a bigger part of me wants to leave. I'm going to list the reasons here, for my own sanity and for inquiring minds...

Reasons I want to stay in college:

-See friends all the time (single thing I will miss the most, by the way. I'm already having this happen with Julie, who graduated in May, and I don't like it one bit).

-Live in my own little single room and do whatever I want

-Chinese food and Italian nights, late night movies, TV marathons with friends

-Biking around campus is the best.

-I love my professors and I still love going to class, as long as it's a good one (not looking forward to statistics and economics though). I love school :)

-Student discounts

-Being on campus in the fall = heaven. Everyone is out and about, and everything is so pretty, and it really calms me.

-The free gym on campus!

-No huge bills to pay

-I know what I'm doing/where everything is now like the back of my hand, and it's comforting. So, comfort level.

Reasons I want to get the heck out of college:

-I want to teach. Plain and simple. I'm impatient.

-No more dorm life. I'm a little sick of being a nomad, and of drunk people, and of freezing my butt off 24/7.

-I'm getting married and I want to live with the man I've been dating for five years! Again, plain and simple.

-NO MORE HOMEWORK :) I would trade writing papers for grading papers any day.

-I will finally be able to sew all I want with my machine, and start my etsy business (with the current busy schedule I have with school, there is no way this can happen).

So you can see why the reasons why I want to graduate reign supreme. I think. They are bigger things. Things I've been waiting for.

But I'm definitely going to enjoy this semester. I'll be taking the usual 4 classes, one of which is for my senior honors thesis on Holocaust memorials (I'm sure I will be posting about this soon). I'm looking forward to accomplishing such a thing as a 50+ page paper, written all by me. It's daunting but exciting. I'm living with Kristina again, which will be totally awesome, and we're going to start marathoning How I Met Your Mother, like we did for Friends in the past (we watched all 10 seasons in a year and a half and it was a blast). I'm living on campus for one semester, not two, so if I get frustrated with everything, I can just look forward to the spring, when I'll be living at home, sewing, student teaching, seeing my family and Mike, babysitting, and basically living in the real world. So, I have a lot to look forward to this year in general.

However, I still can't believe I'm a senior. Freshman year was the fastest year ever, even though it was definitely the most frustrating. Perhaps it's a good thing I don't remember too much :) Getting used to a new place, being away from everything/one I loved, doing college work, working too, having a horrible roommate situation... I remember being sick more in the four months of the fall semester of that year than I ever have before. Sophomore year flew too, but it was definitely my favorite year. Junior year got more busy and difficult than I thought it ever could, but I knew my professors so well and I could finally write a really good history paper. Practice really pays off. I also got to teach my own two week unit in a real high school - so, I had my introduction to teaching, and to say I liked it would be an understatement. Plus, by second semester of sophomore year, I knew who my friends were for sure, and it just got better from there.

I remember going to freshman orientation. I remember so much of it. Am I really about to be a senior? Is this real life?

(skip to .17 seconds)

Yes. Yes. I am. Gulp.

-Jess

Resisting good food is a battle

I've always found it hard to resist good food, and I think this is one of the first times in my memory that I successfully resisted BBQ food - all the leftovers from Fourth of July.

My freshman year of college, I was at my heaviest, and I ate pretty badly. It was definitely a combination of being stressed out and trying to figure out what I liked from the all-you-can-eat dining hall. Sophomore year, I found my go-to dinner - salad with veggies, mushrooms, grilled chicken, and olive oil or house dressing - and sometimes a piece of fruit or something else, or more veggies - and I started eating that several times a week. Plus, I would eat Cheerios with skim milk, oatmeal, or a banana for breakfast every day. And lunch was usually a sandwich of some sort.

Even though I still snack rather scarily, my eating habits have improved - and I started going to the gym several times a week in January of that year. Junior year proceeded the same way, and I'm proud to say that in the last two years I've lost about 20 pounds. And I wasn't even working as hard as I could have to lose it. I could have exercised more, but school got insane. And when it's between working for one more hour on that research paper or getting your butt to the gym, I often went for the former - because school is the most important thing to work on in my life right now.

But every time I'm home, it all goes to hell. We have really yummy dinners that I can't resist, and I have done better with eating less than I used to, but I still feel guilty. Plus, I realized I hate using the treadmill and want an elliptical, but we don't have one (and I don't really have the funds or patience to join a gym around here because I would be seeing half of the kids from my high school), so I either walk, play basketball, or don't exercise at all. I need to improve with that. Either way, I'm healthier at school.

Yesterday, we had burgers, chicken, baked potatoes, and corn. Yum, yum, yum. I had two burgers without even thinking about it, and I feel like such a pig! It's not a big deal or anything and I'm not upset, but I knew that yesterday was my *really* bad eating day for the week. The point is, today, I successfully avoided eating another burger for dinner (even though I really wanted to eat it), and all the other leftovers in the fridge. My mom made salads for the two of us. I feel better now that I've eaten and that I made the right choice (and damn, that salad was good), but it's so hard! I only realized two years ago what eating the burger diet could do to me. I wish it had been sooner.

One thing I couldn't resist today... and I don't regret it at all, because how often do I get to have it? You only live once!

Flag cake from yesterday - strawberries, blueberries (the good stuff), cool whip (lite), and pound cake (the bad but delicious stuff).

Now I'm going to try to take a "work out walk" - as long as it's cooled down out there!

-Jess